Should I go solo? Or, should I remain employed with somebody for the rest of my able life? Oh God! Dilemma, dilemma, dilemma and no solution in sight. So many lost opportunities to lament about and so many new avenues opening up.
Every which way, life at home will be disrupted. What should I do? Should I see my comfort or sacrifice it all as a mother? Opportunities seldom knock at your door, a new horizon beckons me, so does a new land. The lure of the green buck is tremendous but so is the tug at heart.
Should I be gone en route my journey to a brighter life ahead in a distant land or should I fore go everything for the company and laughter of my innocent ones? There is a lot to weigh as pros and cons, but what is it that I seek? Is it fortune and fame or a blissful life ahead?
The decision is not mine to make alone. The journey is not mine to go alone. There is a lot on stake here today, the lure of fame and fortune or the call of loved ones. Should I cling onto my belief or let go with my faith? A dilemma, a constant dilemma between belief and faith.
Of course, there is no one to question me. Yet, I query myself. There is no one to stop me, yet I halt and wonder. What is it that beckons me and what is it that stalls my feet?
I have lost my sleep over it again and again. Have come to no conclusion yet. Till when shall I dilly dally, when shall the dawn , dawn upon me. A dilemma, a constant dilemma; robbing me of my peace of mind, stripping me naked with half baked truth. What do I believe, my faith or my belief?
The strife in my mental make up continues, while I waste my time away. This dilemma is causing the world around me to tumble and come crashing down. What do I do, to rid myself of all my doubts and apprehensions? What do I do to get on ahead with my life? A dilemma, a constant dilemma robbing me of my peace of mind.
What am I getting into... ruing about my life? There is no ifs and buts, just a simple decision to make and a commitment to keep. What am I getting into.... I have connections to make and undertakings to take care of. There is so much to do, yet so little time. What am I doing, wasting my life away? What am I doing, dilly dallying my time away?
There is a lot to fathom, a lot to comprehend. I can't just dive in and take the plunge. What am I getting myself into? I don't know. There is a deep abyss behind me and a path enveloped in fog ahead. Where should I turn to..... into the unknown ahead or like a coward turn around?
The path is rugged and winds through unyielding terrain ahead, yet I desire to plow on, lest I be left behind. I have promised myself roses, aware that there are thorns attached to them. I have dreamt of stars in the dark aware of the distance between them and me. I have gifted life to me, aware of the cost involved in it.
What am I getting into... is no more a dilemma to me. I know for sure, there's no bed of roses awaiting me, yet am confident I can trudge alone. No doubt, the journey is long and lonesome, yet somewhere deep down, am sure , am not alone. There is a spirit guiding me, lighting the way ahead, with angels thrown in for added charisma and drama, to keep the travel entertained.
What am I getting into? A good question to ponder and wonder about. Now there is no time to waste on musings, it's the time to dream and dream big I shall.
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