The Love - Hate Relation we share now ...

The Love that once was ...
Has turned into hatred ...
A Love - Hate Relation...
We Share ... You and I ...
The dark nights remind me ...
Of the Knight you posed as ...
A shadow of your true self ...
Lay exposed to me ...
A fanatic for lust galore ...
You seek women day and night ...
To satisfy your loneliness ...
Your ego and alter ego ...
But, in doing so...
Do you realize what you do those women?

You put the blame on me ...
Whereas it was the other way round ..
you were playing with my feelings ...
Another fish in your net.
Why?

I want an answer ...
An answer to the blasphemy ...
Of your mask ...
your Reality ...
And, who you are.

It is Love that stops me from taking action ...
It is hate that makes me expose you ...
Hatred for the person you are ...
Hatred for the fake character role you play.

You ask me what I want...
I seek Justice....
Justice from your opinionated version of me ...
An explanation for all the promises broken.

The Love - Hate relation will continue ....

There's a lot ...

There's a lot to be written about...
There's a lot to be spoken about ...
There's a lot ...
To be inferred from ...
There's a lot to think about ...
There's a lot ...
Yet, so little to achieve.

What's there to think about?
It is all in the past they say.
They say, forget and forgive ...
They say move on ..
But, is it so easy to do so?
Is it so easy to forget an incident,
That changed the course of your life?
Is it so easy to forget the person...
Who made you lose your self esteem?
Is it so easy to forget ...
The chain of events that followed?
Is it?...

Lot of anger....
Bottled within ...
Lot of pain withheld ...
Lots to spill out ...
Lots to tell about.

#TrollersPark

Read on

Sameekshaa Chaturvedi ... http://confessionsofanunjustlady.blogspot.com/2013/08/sameekshaa-chaturvedi.html

Sameekshaa Chaturvedi ...

Born with a silver spoon in her mouth ... the little girl was oblivious to the pain of the World around her.

The second time round she was born ... she woke up in a pool of blood ... Not hers but ...

Thoroughly loved and pampered, she belonged to a family of eminent people . Her Daddy was the coolest .... A James Bond Personality, seen three brutal attacks the scars as bullet wounds on his torso evident of what his profession was yet a low profile IB officer living in the midst of commoners as a commoner. No one knew who he was but the Government.

He mingled in Diplomatic circles , a beautiful wife alongside. They were Happy.

One day, Sameekshaa wanted a particular doll.... he took her out and she returned home but he didn't.

They were travelling in the car with the driver , a Senior Inspector dressed as a Civilian Driver ... Suddenly , at a crossroad , there were Trucks coming at them at top speed ... In that instant.... IB Chief Chaturvedi knew ... That was the end. He had his daughter with him ... they were hit from both sides by the trucks.... the little girl saw the scenario unawares of what was to come. The car flung into the air and landed upside down, Daddy covered Little Sameekshaa for he knew what was coming ... there was a spray of bullets from all round and then there was silence. Sameekshaa had passed out. When she opened her eyes , she was lying in a pool of blood .... Her own yes ... Daddy's blood. She was blank and staring at the dead weight on her. Her Daddy had saved her.

He was given a silent funeral... no medals no honour .. he was a secret no one knew. She knew ... she knows and that is why she is who she is today .... A Skeletal remain who sees everything clad in blood soaked clothes.

Her mother blamed her for his death. Had she not asked for the doll, Daddy wouldn't have gone out. She was the culprit, the reason behind her widowhood. To this day, Mom doesn't talk to her. To this day, Sameekshaa looks at her photograph and cries each night. She never slept after that day and to this day, walks the World over all alone in the night seeking her Daddy. Where will she get her Daddy from?

She left home, when she turned Eighteen and never went back ... They call her, the Relatives but she has vowed not to go back till she finds Daddy and takes him back home to Mom and she knows deep within her heart , that she will never go back home.

She has travelled the World over ... High up and low ... All her relationships suffered as no one understood what she was seeking . A killer she annihilates and rids the Earth of offenders. No one knows her. No one ... Not even her Mom. She walks the nights ,,,, the streets and rids it of roaches of the society .... A silent killer .... She seeks Revenge ... She seeks the one responsible for her Daddy's death.

She sees the Killer in every man that lies ... she sees him in every cheat ... she sees him everywhere.

She searches high and low for the one the one that ordered her father's termination. She seeks him everywhere.

Judge her not based on your assumptions and presumptuous biased views ... see her as the little girl that opened her eyes soaked in her own father's blood. See her as the little girl who seeks justice from the Government for whom her Father died but never acknowledged his sacrifice. She seeks justice for her Mother , who still dresses everyday in Bridal finery waiting for her Husband as she did that day , it was Karvachauth ... she still awaits him. Sameekshaa can not see her Mother in this state.

Understand her dilemma ... is all she says to the ones left behind.

Nostalgia ...Electronics Junkie .. etcetra ...

Just ... Get me started will ya .... That's what I yell at my Samsung galaxy tab ... Yikes! Getting a hang of technology is what keeps me young in every which way possible. Always at it opening and shredding apart machines just to know what makes them tick.

Am always tinkering with gadgets since childhood. I remember when girls my age played with dolls I built a Ham  radio and listened to people talk over frequencies... I could tap into telephones  ... i was a freak scientist.

I was an avid collector of Arachnids and insects of diabolical appearances. My mom had a tough time keeping my lab clean as the maids refused to enter my Haven of specimens. Biology being my favourite subject, weekends saw me in Naval hospital labs looking at specimens and under the microscopes or assisting friendly Doctors and technicians in the Radiology department or Pathology labs.

When I got married my in laws were aghast, there was a truckload of books that I carried with me along with all my specimens which of course they discarded instantly asking the army jawans in Lucknow to destroy them immediately. I was saddened by this lack of sensitivity towards my Hobby and passion.

I remember collecting and reading Life magazine, Time and National Geographic. I had all the volumes.
I was keen on Genetics and had the best of publications coming to me from all over the World ... The matter for my dissertation on Antisense RNA came all the way from Maryland University... I remember it was stuck in bureaucratic hassles as I stayed at the Naval base and anything Foreign was subject to abject scrutiny.

Staying next to a 18 Hole Golf course next to the Sea at South Bombay, I was a keen Bird Watcher and would often be found in the swampy marshland nearby looking for life and movement.

The Golf Course , of course was my playground where I would train our German Shepherd Django along with Ratan Tata's Tito. The setting Sun was my muse and wish for a swim across the Sea into the Horizon.

Then, of course Clay modelling ... making sculptures as a Sculptor sculpting and carving Clay and driftwood... made a lot many artifacts. Always creating something or the other.

I was keen on Gymnastics and Ballet .. but learnt only Kathak and Bharatnatyam. though also learnt a bit of Manipuri Dance form. Then, again Folk Dance and Music, singing for All India Radio right from Childhood way past into youth from Andamans  to Bombay.

A colourful yet adventurous childhood and youth ... A past to be proud of ... I marched into A life of strife ... from a protected domain to a Wild and unbridled life of a Bride into a different community and clan. With much elan I held my head high and bore the brunt of being a Woman in India  which was never known as a daughter but more so as a Daughter in law. A flower withered away into unknown depths of sadness and depression only to emerge as a Frothing , fuming fire spitting Dragon ten years later. The innocence of yesteryear's lost and only anger projected forth. The state of anger continues though a bit mellowed down yet it remains dormant and erupts at times triggered mostly by the insanely arrogant opposite sex.

Each day a struggle to ignore ignorant fools but trigger they press and make me lose control and I seethe and singe them with my flares. My words that sting and hurt worse than any weapon imaginable and fathomable by humanity.

Anyways ... more shall come from the keyboard used to bring forth the pearls above ...

The Silver Valley Rafter ...

There is a place deep within the confines of The Great Grand Canyon .... No one has ever seen it ... no one has been able to discover it ... They call it the Silver Valley.

Legend has it that Only one lone Ranger crossed all hurdles to reach that Place and made it his home ... The Rafter.

An Old Injun saying makes him the legend that he has become .... The Rafter ... they say that he was kind and gentle yet a bounty hunter. He crossed the River of No Return and braved the rapids upstream to reach Silver Valley and decided to make it his home rather than ravage the beauty by mining.

There are folk lore of the Indians .... from days of yore of how he fell in love with an orphaned Indian Girl and married her and they lived happily ever after in Silver Valley.

More astonishing is their death. They died together ... hand held fast and lying in their wedding finery after five decades of holy matrimony.

Many brave came and went , they never found the valley ever again ... buried deep within the Grand Canyon lies a beautiful world of shine and sunshine untouched by anyone ever again. They say the spirit of the Rafter awaits one of pure heart to allow them entry to the Silver Valley.

A beautiful Valley awaits the entry of true lovers ... True  to their nature and Nature lovers for the pristine environs of the Silver Valley.

Banke ki Mansha kya thi? Just another Prized Possession?

Well, what was in his mind that he followed her and trapped her in his net?

No one knows ... Only Banke knows.

Sameekshaa confronted him with the Mansha issue. Who is this Mansha, that you are so close to?
 He said, Oh! She is no one just another Twitter follower for Time pass. She means nothing to me. You are my Cutie Beauty. Come in my arms, let me hug you. Don't be so insecure, I am only here for you.

Poor Sameekshaa, she believed all his lies and went weak. She believed him and his white lies about his career and family , she opened up and told him all about herself. A weakness Bankelal became for Sameekshaa, she stopped going to work ... all day long and night she would be with him. Whenever she questioned him about his flirting with Mansha and Shikha, he said they were nobody just Twitter followers. She believed every lie he told her. She stopped eating just waiting upon him.

People wondered what had gone wrong ... she didn't say. To this day, she is waiting somewhere within an  Iron exterior , waiting for him to turn back and say, I never cheated you Sameekshaa but reality is something else. He cheated on her all along. She was just another prized possession.

People ask her , why don't you sleep? She laughs it off...how can she say that she still waits for the Return of Chandra Shekhar Pati Tripathi. The man who disappeared into the oblivion.

She smiles a fake smile .... feigning happiness whereas all that she encompasses within her dainty self is painful ache of her Truth.

Why did she tell the Truth? It was beautiful till it lasted.


>>> To be continued #TrollersBook

Tables turned on a Conman ...

Imagine A Conman conned into believing and then disbelieving that he can be hurt in his own Game plan.  It happened  and a fact, he is sore about it and hurting as he didn't believe anyone could really turn the tables on him. When the tables turned he was like a cowering Hyena not knowing where to run to. he hid, then came out of hiding with another plan, much vicious than before but the Lair wasn't enough to save him and he was caught in his own net.

He thought he could ensnare Sameekshaa in his net and play with her feelings for a while and move on , little knowing that Sameekshaa his 'Cutie Beauty' was well aware of all his lies and intentions. She played along... all night long , all those nights while he fell in the trap and revealed his self ... another lie ... another white lie about himself.

All those lovey dovey conversations... sleepless nights in his virtual arms... She forgot who she was. She became the character she was portraying. She became one with him. She became His and that was the turning point.

She couldn't lie to him if she really loved him . Right? So, one night , she mustered the courage to brace herself against his wrath when she would reveal her identity to him. She did , and he flared up. Instead of appreciating the honesty, he felt cheated. the Cheat felt cheated. She was aghast ... he didn't love Sameekshaa at all. Not for a moment. All he was doing was trapping just another innocent girl in the name of love and false promises.

She retreated in to her shell to regain her composure and face him . A face off was needed. He was not ready to see the truth and irony of his existence. To this day he remains defensive whereas all she did was what he is doing even today and conning the rest of the World.


---->>> To be Continued #TrollersPark