Death defies her...

She tried her level best to end her life...
To cheat life ..
To go away ..
She couldn't. ..
She lived tor her flock ...
She lived for her love...
But couldn't. ...
It hurts her to stifle herself...
She tried her best to annihilate her morta being,
But, each time death defied her

It has no intentions of taking her ...
But, what should she live for ....
A constantly violent world.

Her love she canot love,
And , yet can't see him with another ....
So, she needs to go ...
Go far away....
No , she won't be able to forget him...
She will live with his memories ....
She can't love another....
His little ones remind him of her....
And it hurts....
Innocent boys reminding of him .... she has to go away.
Goes away she does ...
With a heavy heart....
Keeping his love alive in her heart...
Vowing never to come back ...
Or ever be discovered.

She leaves behind her flock...
Her own flesh and blood...
Wondering what will become of them...
And crying to her hearts content.

She walks away in the middle of the night ....
Never ever to return.
Hurting deep within...
The pain of a mother....
The pain.  of love lost ...she just walks away never to return.

She doesn't know where she is heading...
All she knows is ....
No more emotions to tie her down.....
A steley resolve....
Heavy on her chest ...
She eggs on her journey never to return.

Know he who reads her ...
She loved you, she loves you and will always love you....
Whether they be her flock or her first love.

Debauchery thy name is love...

He came I  suddenly ...
Like a wind ...
The symbol of Adultery...
Thesign of debauchery...
Name apt ...
The Symbol ...
The leader that leads to destruction ...
His flock...
The verh symbol ...
The Pratik as the Indians say ...
Of sex and lies ...
Of conniving heidiousness ...
The devil in disguise...
Dressed as a Salesman...
Thedeathless vermin...
Fancying himself as handsome ...
How he survived all these conniving years ...
He is a walking symbol of weakness ...
Festering in the womb of his mother ...
He gained strength ...
To dishonour the family name.

Pure in her love,
She saw him trying to kill her ...
The scum of Earth ...
The Conman ...
Roams free ...
Sleepless devising ways ...
To ensnare another.

His debauchery unadulterated truth ...
To sagisfy his satanic libido.

She laughs...

She laughs the last ...
When she witnesses the Hippo ...
In all her foolhardiness ...
Bouncing around ...
Her boobs pouncing up to her cheeks ...
The fatso ...
Enjoying presumably ...
In her dreams with the Salesman.

What a scene ...
They create ...
In falsifying ...
And denying there ain't nothing wrong ...
Else the Conman wouldn't be laying others ...
Either she lacks in something ...
Or he has a high libido as he claims.

She laughs at their false happiness ...
She laughs last ...
When all fall aparts in their World ...
For she has her own vices too...
Her demons to fight ...
The ljmp of fatty acids and lipids ...
Has an alternate to the gamer ...
She lives with ....
The known fella ...
Who visits her in his absence ..
Whom she meets and mates in his absence ...
She laughs last ...
Clearly evident ...
A family of weirdos ...
They live in a false utopian world ...
Of sex , connivance and   ...
Adultery

It wasn't so hard to ignore ...

A large gathering, a public event... He came in with the Hippo tagging along. It wasn't so hard to ignore him  and the Hippo. The Tigress knew, it was just stale meat and a junk load of Fatty acids and lipids rumbling across the preying fields. She coolly moved away ... taking the cubs with her for the day to begin with.

Who could have thought that the one whom the Tigress loved all her life was nothing but a cunning Fox in a Lion's mask. But, when she did know the reality, she just cut him off from her list of likable animals. She had other things to occupy her, her thoughts and her actions.

The sly fox , watching her every move through the corner of his eyes ... slithering around , hiding behind bushes , She just ignored those so evident moves ... for her focus was on the little ones and the pride of the Jungle.

Had the pride of the Jungle not been at stake, she would have gladly exposed the cheap fox and the Hippo tagging along for the heinous crime committed to make their ends meet.

Welcome to the Jungle! And, I am the Queen ... Any doubts? Better clear them before I pounce upon you and annihilate you completely, devouring your artificial happiness... clawing you to a painful death.

Ritsuka...

She was named Ritsuka ...The successful one ...The most beautiful one.

Born, a mistake ...She lived life on the edge...Always on the move ...Living out of suitcases, she was a vagabond on the move always.

Ritsuka, having left a life of luxuries lived life on her own terms which always brought on the edge of a precipice, life changing decisions that left her alone in her journey, yet move on she did and as always today again she must take herchances , come to a decision and move away from the crowd that gathers around her.

She walks away, with what little she has on her ... stops for a moment, turns around , sees happy smiling faces ... gives a knowing smile , a small laughter escapes her throat and she walks away.

By the time people realize her absence, she had already gone too far into the mountains , away from human connections and in a far away place hidden from the reality of the urban jungle she had left behind. Ritsuka was no more Ritsuka , she was just another free spiritroaming the wilderness , a white light that couldn't be contained. She was no more a mortal being ... she was the light that people saw on moonless nights, guiding weary travellers lost in the forest of nowhere ... leading them to a meaningful life.

Ritsuka with the hair of the wise one adorning her scalp ... The most beautiful  damsel ... wandering the forgotten land of the forgotten ones ... rises from the ashes each day as a beacon  of hope for the countless millions wretchedly drenched I  their penury of life, reeking of death ... she imparts a scent to their rotting bodies.

Ritsuka ... the untouched virgin beauty ... walks the heaven on Earth.

This is why I love you ...

When I am really hurting ...
When I am blurting it all out ...
When am sad ...
When I lash out ...
You remain calm ...
You remain in the background ...
You don't say a word ...
You just remain you ...
That is why ...
This is why I love you ...
Whatever I do,
Whatever is my reaction ...
I do it all for you ...
I do it all for us.

I could have gone away ...
Yet, I stood my ground ...
I killed my own ...
Stifled and stood tall ...
I do it all for you ...
I do it all for us.


My love for you shall remain forever ..
Embedded deep within ....
Eyes crying ...
Tears rolling down ...
I still shall not know you ...
I stayed behind ...
Just for you.

Coz' all I know is ...
I can't unlove you ...
So...
I do it all for you ...
I do it for us.

The Temple of Love ...

Home ...
The Real Temple of Love ...
Of Dignity and pride ...
In one's name and pride ...
The Lioness that hunts for her cubs ...
She is the Tigress ...
That protects her own ...
Her Life may be a turmoil ...
But, never the heat ...
Touches her loved ones ...
Her Home ...
Her Temple of Peace ...
Her young ones ...
Her Strength.

Walking the difficult paths of life...
A journey not alone ...
Her stoic companions ...
Her little ones ...
No, she won't squander that love ...
For temporary feelings ...
Wayward humans ...
Her life waves ...
Rising and falling ...
Typhoons come and go ...
But, her Temple stands Strong ...
Built on unconditional Love ...
Her Temple withstands all Hurricanes ...
Proud in the stance taken ...
She preens her wings ...
To yet face another challenge.

I am not Helpless...

Let go, just enjoy your life ... consider yourself helpless, you can do nothing. He is on his own ... leave him... when the placental cord was cut, your responsibility towards your child was over... Never , never ever again would a mother want to  hear that.

We make mistakes, we alone are not affected by them , everyone associated with us are affected.

I have made mistakes , I have no regrets yet my mistakes have catapulted my loved ones to moments of despair. No, am not going to wallow in self pity and say I am HELPLESS.

NO! I am not helpless... my mistakes have taught me important lessons in life but I won't ever let anyone tell me I am helpless for I am a mother and a mother never gives up on her child.

My children are my strength... my pillars of courage.  They have kept me grounded and alive. My kids have kept me smiling and laughing even through trying times. If they fall, I help them get up and face it all with courage. I stand by them through good and bad . I don't label them. I have caused them pain, they have lost their childhood because of my unforgiving nature... I will bring them back from the brink of getting nowhere in life to the lost happiness. I will amend my mistakes and give them what they desire to be the best always. These are trying times , they have lost hope... I haven't. 

I won't give up on my children. I am not helpless. I am strong and the power above has given me the capability to endure this too.

This too shall pass, and we shall be together again. We shall overcome all the pain and despair to become  the best that we are. 

Yes, others are helpless but not a mother. A mother can do wonders to make her child better once again. A mother can never lose hope. She can withstand any calamity , she can fight them all. A mother I am and I stand between the devil and my child. I can ward off any evil , fight all the demons ... for I am not HELPLESS.