Confessions of an Unjust Lady : Altruistic Renditions: Somewhere something is amiss ...

Confessions of an Unjust Lady : Altruistic Renditions: Somewhere something is amiss ...: Not to ask is ... The query why one consumes... Poison every day.... To forget what ... A past that has no meaning ... Today, tomorrow...

Somewhere something is amiss ...

Not to ask is ...
The query why one consumes...
Poison every day....
To forget what ...
A past that has no meaning ...
Today, tomorrow or ...
The day after.

Yet, consumed ...
In its solitary thoughts...
Confined to a darkness within ...
One remembers the pain ...
The ache that doesn't let ...
Her forgive the devils from the past ...
Everything has changed ...
Yet she remains ...
The same old messed up aching heart ...
Searching for the lost soul within ...
One, she might never find ever.

Everything seems hunky dory ...
Yet, somewhere something seems amiss ...
A mockery of feelings ...
Does destiny desire that?

The mindlessness of the thoughts ...
The blabbering of an unrested tongue ...
The solitary confinement of a troubled mind ...
Somewhere something is amiss.

The fluttering desires ...
Take over ...
An uncouth fantasy takes wing ...
Soaring high ...
Losing vanity is imminent ...
Yet, a stoic silence ...
Breaks the in vain attempt ...
To be rapturously happy ...
A facade ...
That shows ...
Somewhere something is amiss.

The 'Unwanted One' ...

'Unwanted ' even by Death,
Destiny's very own 'Unwanted' child...
 No one wanted her ...
The Extra 'Unwanted' One ...
The one , no one needed ...
She survived all the upheavals ...
Every corner a Death plunge ..
why she survived? Unwanted by Death ,
Unwanted by Life ...
She just exists ...
Unwanted in love ,
Yet wanted for Lust ...
She survives her Unwantedness.
They say 'Lucky' ...
But, in reality 'Unwanted'...
Needed for the luck she brings ...
Needed for bein the Hen that lays the Golden eggs ...
But, yet 'Unwanted'.

Wsnted for flings...
Wanted for affairs ...
Unwanted for love ...
Unwanted for permanence.

Wanted for goodies...
Wanted for material stuff...
Yet Unwanted ....
Wanted for money ..
Yet, Unwanted for love.

Unwanted by the one above ,
Unwanted by the ones around ,

Unwanted everywhere ...
What purpose does she fulfill?

No purpose in sight ...
she watches them walk past ...
Used and forlorn...
She feels so Unwanted ....
She watches them go by, one by one ....
She looks up a the sky ...
The dark night ...
No stars ....
Unwanted in her solitude ...
She hangs her head ...
And walks by ...
UNWANTED.

The Wail ...

She sat beside him silently watching him wail in vain, A childlike persona in a grown man, She held him in her embrace , cuddled him and kissed him on the forehead, He quietened down and slept peacefully.

This whole exercise happened each night and she held him close, watching over him all night long , sleeping beside his bed on a reclining chair praying for peace to overcome his troubled mind.

He slowly became alright but in the whole process she lost herself somewhere and forgot who she was. He became alright and forgot what sacrifices she had made for him. She was bereft of her self esteem and pride and he went back to his wayward ways.

One night, when the World was welcoming a new year ; she was walking the streets where she roamed around with him, a suitcase dragging from her limp hand, Her head held in shame, her life ruined , tears streaming down her cheeks  ... She was lost even to herself.

The wail she used to quieten in him, escaped her lips and she doubled up on the sidewalk , waif like, like a street urchin wailing on the streets of his city. All her confidence and resolve shattered , she was just another number added to his list of victims.

The silence of the night broken by a soulful wail escaping her lips was all one could hear that welcomed the New Year.

The step towards the silver Sunset ...

Not looking back...
Walking ahead ...
She welcomes the first rays of the Sunrise that lead her towards the Silver Sunset.

Above the horizon she watches the Seagulls...
Swooping down upon the calm sea ...
The calmness invades her ...
And she becomes one with the peace of the moment.

She knows not if their is a God ...
But, she knows of an all pervading presence ...
That watches over her ...
The one that shows her the path ...
To greatness within.

In her solitude she finds company ...
The recluse once again dons her robe ...
A slight wry smile escapes her lips ...
And she takes to the task of her daily grind.

The step towards the silver sunset begins...

Special Someone ...

It takes a special someone to bring out the best in you.

Life has been  one big roller coaster ride and am glad these ups and downs happened. It brought out the strength in an otherwise weak woman. Anyone else would have debilitated under the pressure , I persevered. Now, nothing affects me. I have moved on from an emotional being to one practical person with empathy for the others state of mind.

No one is born bad, it is the circumstances that make us good or bad. It is the inner strength within which decides whether we have overcome the pain , the trials and tribulations to become one above the rest.

It takes a special someone to bring out the best in us.  I had the opportunity to be affected by a lot of special people in my life. Each one gave me an experience to remember, look back upon and learn from.

Today too, I have been touched by the inclusion of a special human being whose presence has made me realize my resilience and am glad to have him with me to share the rest of our lives together.

Hoping for the best , I move forth from the past to a promised bright future.

It really has taken a special someone to bring the best out in me.

Time framed ...

They say, Time is a great healer...
She says, that's true.
With time ...
It all changed...
She was able to get over it all.

She outgrew all that held her back ...
She grew her own wings again...
Soaring once again ...
The Phoenix rose from her ashes.

Once again ...
A bird of Paradise ...
She cooed her existence ...
All the ones gone ...
Forgotten ...
And a new journey began.

The journey of life ...
Always taking her to heights ...
Never traversed but thought of ...
Once again, her adventures began.

She was happy ...
She assigned happiness a role ...
To play in her life ...
An important aspect of her lost personality...
Gained once again.

Once again she has made pacts with fate ...
Framed the time ...
Frozen her feelings ...
A stoic silence on her lips ...
She takes flight ...
Swirling upwards ...
A spiral ...
She flies yet again on her terms.

What does little Birdie say ?

What does little Birdie say,
In his nest each fine day?
Mamma, let me fly away,
Mamma let me fly ...
Mother said to little Birdie ...
Wait a little longer,
Till your wings are little stronger...
Then you fly away.

So, she waits a little longer,
Till her wings are little stronger,
Then, she flies away .

My Son,
My first born,
Is ready for his flight ...
I as a Mother ,
Must let go ...
My Baby has grown ,
Grown into a strapping lad ...
One with a mind of his own...
A strong man ,
He has become...
Not only physically,
but, also mentally and emotionally ...
This Birdie takes flight today ..
A new World of opportunities await my Son...
Go, go on and conquer the World ...
With your wit and wry humour.


A whole new horizon awaits ...
To be discovered ...
Go, my Son ...
Do your mother proud ...
Let her gloat in your glory...
For her silver sunset is made.